A DIFFERENT KIND OF MERCY
Of late, the phenomenon that is the mercy fuck has been brought out in the open. But the act isn’t anything new. Mercy fucking has most likely been performed for as long as men and women have been fornicating. However, the term’s popularity is only starting to peak in the Philippines.
Sex-Lexis.com, an online dictionary of sexual terms, defines a mercy fuck (also called the pity fuck or courtesy copulation) as a sex act “performed when one person feels sorry for another.”
The website also documents what its researchers believed to be one of the earliest instances when the term was used in a movie. In a little-known offbeat 1993 flick, The Pickle, Ellen Stone (Dyan Cannon) consents to have sex with her ex Harry (Danny Aiello) to keep him from jumping out the window. But, she tells him, “Just remember, this is a mercy fuck.”
More recently, the HBO series Sex and the City did much to further popularize the term. In a fourth season episode aired in 2002, titled “Belles of the Balls,” lawyer Miranda (Cynthia Nixon) has sex with an ex-boyfriend who is left with only one testicle after being treated for prostrate cancer. When she tells her friends that she has gotten pregnant from her act of charity, one of them turns to her and asks, “Mercy fuck?”
As such, the mercy fuck giver may be a woman who takes it upon herself to screw a man who has serious self-esteem issues—caused by various reasons such as dick deformity, a bad childhood, or a bad break-up. The mercy fuck giver could also be a man who is determined to rise to the occasion despite the fact that the woman has psychotic tendencies, a funky aroma, and a more-than-passing resemblance to Mighty Mouse.
Yes, you might say some people just can’t say, “No.” You could also say they’re just perverted do-gooders. And they remain in this exalted status as long as the mercy fuck recipients never find out that they were serviced out of pity.
Look at it this way: porn stars get paid to fake it. Mercy fuck givers just do it out of kindness. (For the purposes of this entry, we’re only discussing non-professional mercy fuck givers.) Most of the time, the mercy fuck recipients don’t even thank them. One mercy fuck giver laments, “Afterwards, the guy even had the nerve to ask me if I missed his tiny dick! He bought my lie! I created a monster!” Another relates: “After I went out of my way to make her happy in bed, she dumped. I made her too confident!”
For the most part, the mercy fuck is merely a naughty good deed. Why should doing a good turn be confined to bailing out a friend from the city jail or helping Quiapo’s bootleg DVD vendors make a living?
Of course, mercy fucking is just a tad bit pathetic for both parties involved.
In my opinion, the only thing worse than a mercy fuck is mercy phone sex. Call it the “poor relation” of true mercy fucking.
From the time the idea of phone sex was conceived, mercy phone sex was inevitable. Phone sex is all about fucking through the use of one’s mind. With the right minds in on the act, it can indeed be a very pleasant experience. Unfortunately, not everyone is blessed with a mind that is capable of fucking well. As a friend of mine likes to say, "One cannot 'mind fuck' with an idiot."
Aside from people in long distance relationships or people who for some reason can’t have real sex just yet, phone sex propositions abound in adult chatrooms. There, one virtual stranger can hook up with another for the safest sex imaginable. This is where the fun or the agony begins. For starters, attempting to hook up with a suitable phone sex partner in an adult chatroom is somewhat like being blind and trying to buy provocative underwear on your own. Although, I’m told, one does get lucky sometimes.
In the mercy fuck scenario, the problem usually starts when the mercy fuck recipient’s physical attributes and/or bedroom skills leave much to be desired. This prompts the mercy fucker to act out in order to just get it all over with. At some point, the mercy fucker’s brain shuts down. This blissful “spacing out” is a luxury alien to mercy phone sex givers. On the telephone, there is no escape.
Mercy phone sex happens when one unfortunately “connects” with an idiot. Although this misconnection often ensues from instant partnerships forged in adult chatrooms, it can also happen with people who already know each other. (How it happens is another story.)
I imagine it must be sheer hell to have phone sex with a person whose mind isn’t worth fucking with. (Read: People who think that phone sex only involves moaning and grunting.)
Sure, one can just put the phone down or pretend that government spies are tapping the line at the first sign of idiocy. But mercy phone sex givers just can’t do that. The Good Samaritan in them is just too strong.
Sex-Lexis.com, an online dictionary of sexual terms, defines a mercy fuck (also called the pity fuck or courtesy copulation) as a sex act “performed when one person feels sorry for another.”
The website also documents what its researchers believed to be one of the earliest instances when the term was used in a movie. In a little-known offbeat 1993 flick, The Pickle, Ellen Stone (Dyan Cannon) consents to have sex with her ex Harry (Danny Aiello) to keep him from jumping out the window. But, she tells him, “Just remember, this is a mercy fuck.”
More recently, the HBO series Sex and the City did much to further popularize the term. In a fourth season episode aired in 2002, titled “Belles of the Balls,” lawyer Miranda (Cynthia Nixon) has sex with an ex-boyfriend who is left with only one testicle after being treated for prostrate cancer. When she tells her friends that she has gotten pregnant from her act of charity, one of them turns to her and asks, “Mercy fuck?”
As such, the mercy fuck giver may be a woman who takes it upon herself to screw a man who has serious self-esteem issues—caused by various reasons such as dick deformity, a bad childhood, or a bad break-up. The mercy fuck giver could also be a man who is determined to rise to the occasion despite the fact that the woman has psychotic tendencies, a funky aroma, and a more-than-passing resemblance to Mighty Mouse.
Yes, you might say some people just can’t say, “No.” You could also say they’re just perverted do-gooders. And they remain in this exalted status as long as the mercy fuck recipients never find out that they were serviced out of pity.
Look at it this way: porn stars get paid to fake it. Mercy fuck givers just do it out of kindness. (For the purposes of this entry, we’re only discussing non-professional mercy fuck givers.) Most of the time, the mercy fuck recipients don’t even thank them. One mercy fuck giver laments, “Afterwards, the guy even had the nerve to ask me if I missed his tiny dick! He bought my lie! I created a monster!” Another relates: “After I went out of my way to make her happy in bed, she dumped. I made her too confident!”
For the most part, the mercy fuck is merely a naughty good deed. Why should doing a good turn be confined to bailing out a friend from the city jail or helping Quiapo’s bootleg DVD vendors make a living?
Of course, mercy fucking is just a tad bit pathetic for both parties involved.
In my opinion, the only thing worse than a mercy fuck is mercy phone sex. Call it the “poor relation” of true mercy fucking.
From the time the idea of phone sex was conceived, mercy phone sex was inevitable. Phone sex is all about fucking through the use of one’s mind. With the right minds in on the act, it can indeed be a very pleasant experience. Unfortunately, not everyone is blessed with a mind that is capable of fucking well. As a friend of mine likes to say, "One cannot 'mind fuck' with an idiot."
Aside from people in long distance relationships or people who for some reason can’t have real sex just yet, phone sex propositions abound in adult chatrooms. There, one virtual stranger can hook up with another for the safest sex imaginable. This is where the fun or the agony begins. For starters, attempting to hook up with a suitable phone sex partner in an adult chatroom is somewhat like being blind and trying to buy provocative underwear on your own. Although, I’m told, one does get lucky sometimes.
In the mercy fuck scenario, the problem usually starts when the mercy fuck recipient’s physical attributes and/or bedroom skills leave much to be desired. This prompts the mercy fucker to act out in order to just get it all over with. At some point, the mercy fucker’s brain shuts down. This blissful “spacing out” is a luxury alien to mercy phone sex givers. On the telephone, there is no escape.
Mercy phone sex happens when one unfortunately “connects” with an idiot. Although this misconnection often ensues from instant partnerships forged in adult chatrooms, it can also happen with people who already know each other. (How it happens is another story.)
I imagine it must be sheer hell to have phone sex with a person whose mind isn’t worth fucking with. (Read: People who think that phone sex only involves moaning and grunting.)
Sure, one can just put the phone down or pretend that government spies are tapping the line at the first sign of idiocy. But mercy phone sex givers just can’t do that. The Good Samaritan in them is just too strong.
With the welfare of the valiant mercy phone sex givers in mind, here are three easy steps to help them get through the ordeal:1. Close your eyes and recite: “Oh, yes, yes, yes. You are getting me so wet.” or “You are getting me so hard!”
2. Repeat the cheesy dialogue as often as necessary. Flatter the mercy phone sex recipient as much as possible.
3. Towards the end, scream your head off like you’re being serviced by Totoy Mola or grunt like you’re giving it to Angelina Jolie. (They’re sounds of desperation, but the other party doesn’t have to know.)
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